Things is lookin up at Aintry!

B.M. Barrelcooker

12 pointer
Jan 12, 2006
4,715
Aintry,Ky
Well we have been out surveyin and lookin for dead indian trinkets and such for a while now and Ol Ray has kinda formulated a plan. We are hopin to get some dirt pushed around by october so we can have some water for the fall ducks in what is going to be the Aintry W.R.P. project.

We hate to take valuble farmland out of production especially since all them little fellers over in tiwan an places is justa starvin real bad for corn because of the ethanol plants but we really had to do somethin. You see it all started with a simple conversation over a suasage bisquit in the duckblind with Mmayes:

We was huntin at the slip one day and had shot a few spoonies but things was relativley slow. Me an Earl had already boiled up the last pack of boudain and it weren't even eight o-clock yet. So against our better judgement we decided to place a call in order to Mmayes.( Now ya have to know that even though on this internet Mmayes seems like a real tough Man among men kinda guy , he really has a fatal weakness. Thats right he really does. He loves....I mean he craves to shoot ducks. He is a killer of the webfooted birds like no other. he will crawl across glass to kill a hen woodie with a stick...........I mean to tell you he hates them . He hates 'em bad. Knowing his unsettled desire to kill fowl has given us a power over him that is on the borderline of unethical. You see for the mear chance...an opportunity to smash a greenhead with some number 2's at close range the oft rabid Mmayes will do just about anything...............and we take full advantage of his weakness.) One quick cell phone call into town and Mmayes is out of his office and into his truck headin to Huck's for a bag of sausage bisquits and a six-pack of diet pepsi to make a personal delivery. All we had to promise was a seat at the end of the blind for an hour. It was an easy deal other than the fact that we had to listen to his bloodlust desires while we ate our grub.

So as we sat enjoying our food under empty skies Mmayes launches into a tirade about them big-whigs down river at the Gobin Slash. He rails them nonstop about how they got all the ducks hemmed up in "feed fields" and they are too upity to shoot hens and how they wouldn't know how to really shilack them if they had a chance and how Aintry used to be a "helluva" spot before them big city dudes established their own private refuge. He kept mumbling about how you could walk across the mallard backs. It wasn't long before he was visbly shaken and we thought he was goin into somekinda epelectic shock or somethin.

Earl grabbed him with both hands around the neck and I hit him upside the head with my avery shell pouch-handwarmer and his eyes kinda glazed over and he handed me a wrinkled peice of paper with a phone number. He could barely whisper the words,"call Ray,W.R.P." We didn't know what the hell he meant and almost imediatley he had a nice little bunch of mallards slide in on us right over the blind and we knocked down 4 greenheads 1 hen and a black Me and Earl looked at each other like old hunting partners often do and even though we took this little bunch as a sign we didn't mention a word of it....not with him around. After the dog brought back our ducks we settled in as if nothing was out of sync and shortly thereafter mmayes hour was up and he reluctantly removed himself from the blind. Not another word was mentioned about Mmaye's "incident" for the rest of the season but shortly after closing day I pulled that crumpled paper from my wallet and gave Ray a call.

Now we are headlong into a pretty significant wetlands project . We have become good friends with Ray . And while we may kindly want to compete with them big city fellers at the slash we know that they share the common goal of wanting to enrich the local waterfowl habitat and encourage the ducks to hang around theese parts and be available for all of us so we wish them good luck as well.
As for Mmayes ....huh! We never hear from him when season is out but my garbage man said he heard that Mmayes got busted again at the local park the other day trying to catch the tamies with a dip net and popcorn while on his lunch break. He'll definatley be saner when it starts to cool off and season comes in.
 

mmayes

12 pointer
Aug 2, 2005
2,730
Near Aintry
Tammies aren't bad to eat especially when slow roasted over a trash barrel. :D

Glad to hear Aintry is doing well. I need to get down there and check out all the work you have done.

Mayes
 

B.M. Barrelcooker

12 pointer
Jan 12, 2006
4,715
Aintry,Ky
We were listening to Neal Young and driving thru the summer nighttime air with the windows down. It was dark and the stars were out. I could smell autumn coming on as we cruised past the cornfields. It was summertime alright and the daytime heat had melted everything into a slow trudge towards the fall harvest and the frosty glory of duck season but we couldn't wait. We were moving now and fast. Headed to the Alabama Gulf coast and some reefs we had marked on the gps the year before.

Mmayes was driving,smoking heavy and drinking truckstop coffee from a rusty thermos cup that he seemed to always have on his person. I was tired from days on the road but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't tune out his endless chatter. Not only was it the same old nonsense about the big city dudes downstream at the slash but he was running down the ballard crowd and some of our favorite Avery reps. but he had no cadence. His tirardes were all offbeat like an iowa farmboy trying to rap.

It was getting old and finally Billy had had enough. He got a spatuala from behind the back seat.Why he had it I'll never know but he smacked Ole Mmayes dead on in the kisser with it. And he had a Marlboro one hundred in his lips at the time. Billy hit him pretty good and the dang filter of that smoke must have hit that little thingy that makes you gag.

Next thing I know there is vomit all over the inside of the windshield glass and none of us can see a thing but I know we are swerving.It was bad.
We hit a chicken truck at 95 miles an hour,hit a culvert did three complete flips and landed on all fours headed the other way.

Me and scout got ejected into the median. I had a bruised hip and scout had a broken jaw. Mmayes slowed down for a second to ask if we were alright. Billy just dropped his head as I gave them the finger and started walkin towards my Kentucky home. Scout hasn't barked or nothin since that night and I ain't seen Mmayes or Billy.

I can't help but wonder if them silly bastards ended up catchin any fish.
 

ceohunter

10 pointer
Dec 11, 2001
1,451
Western Ky. Coalfields.
BM, tell me more about people you know who hate ducks and geese so bad. I know guys who will drive hours to sit and wait in the bright sun no wind with hopes of killing just one. They really really hate them.
 

Fakout

Fawn
Jul 30, 2008
34
B.M.,
You will never change, and I hope you never do! Its always fun to hear you tell a story. I bet you could read a grocery list and make that entertaining too.

We were listening to Neal Young and driving thru the summer nighttime air with the windows down. It was dark and the stars were out. I could smell autumn coming on as we cruised past the cornfields. It was summertime alright and the daytime heat had melted everything into a slow trudge towards the fall harvest and the frosty glory of duck season but we couldn't wait. We were moving now and fast. Headed to the Alabama Gulf coast and some reefs we had marked on the gps the year before.

Mmayes was driving,smoking heavy and drinking truckstop coffee from a rusty thermos cup that he seemed to always have on his person. I was tired from days on the road but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't tune out his endless chatter. Not only was it the same old nonsense about the big city dudes downstream at the slash but he was running down the ballard crowd and some of our favorite Avery reps. but he had no cadence. His tirardes were all offbeat like an iowa farmboy trying to rap.

.
 


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