Innocence lost

Discussion in 'Community Forum' started by Danno, Feb 25, 2021.

  1. Danno

    Danno Spike

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    Oct 20, 2020
    Jefferson county
    I don't know if I'm alone in this but, i feel like a child when i first discovered Santa wasn't real. Today at approximately 8:47pm, i heard a fart. Now under normal circumstances it wouldn't alarm me, but you see it was only my wife and i in the room.... and it wasn't me. Now I've held the belief that women don't poo, rather they produce unicorn sneezes, and bubblegum. Now i asked my beautiful wife if by chance a frog, or a duck had found it's way inside only to receive a slight giggle and a "nope." Whoa wait a minute.... that means.... no it can't be.
     
  2. bgkyarcher

    bgkyarcher 12 pointer

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    Aug 23, 2011
    BG
    How long you been married?
     
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  3. Danno

    Danno Spike

    84
    64
    Oct 20, 2020
    Jefferson county
    9 years
     
  4. Mt Pokt

    Mt Pokt 6 pointer

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    Nov 8, 2018
    Campbell County
    Funny we were just talking about this. Wife has a way of curling up next to me on the couch. A couple of weeks back with her exhaust planted against my thigh, and her soundly asleep...
    well, she soon found herself fighting for that space on the couch next to me while I (obviously, and as every good husband is obligated to do) made a huge deal of it and fought her away.
     
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  5. bgkyarcher

    bgkyarcher 12 pointer

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    BG
    That's the first time?
     
  6. 00noturkey

    00noturkey 12 pointer

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    Oct 31, 2011
    High Grove
    you should be happy that shes reLAXED in your marriage. got any clothes pins for your nose?, i hear Vick's works if you use that inside your nostrils. welcome to the club.
    gotta say i aint married, but i been around long enough to know, married women get relaxed. :D:(:D
     
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  7. muddhunter

    muddhunter 12 pointer

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    Oct 18, 2005
    louisville
    He's in for a real treat if he ever watches her give birth. Those are some sights and sounds you can't get back in the box.
     
  8. Danno

    Danno Spike

    84
    64
    Oct 20, 2020
    Jefferson county
    I mean, I've heard squeaky floor boards, house settling noises, pipes flapping around, but my wife has never... if i hear something odd i can always turn to her and she offers me the various explanations.... And ya know they sound legit
     
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  9. bgkyarcher

    bgkyarcher 12 pointer

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    BG
    Damn, she's good, lol.
     
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  10. PUBLIC RAT

    PUBLIC RAT 8 pointer

    676
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    Feb 18, 2014
    You guys must work opposite shifts or not sleep in same bed together. Hope your wife doesn't know you posted this, you will be in the doghouse. Next time say with a straight face, I didn't know you played the trumpet.
     
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  11. EdLongshanks

    EdLongshanks 12 pointer

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    Nov 16, 2013
    Northern Kentucky
    You need to make sure that she knows this is unacceptable behavior and it will not be tolerated. That is heartbreaking and I feel for you.
     
    Last edited: Feb 25, 2021
  12. EdLongshanks

    EdLongshanks 12 pointer

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    Northern Kentucky
    One time too many mister.
     
  13. bgkyarcher

    bgkyarcher 12 pointer

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    Aug 23, 2011
    BG
    Huh? LMAO. Just wait......
     
  14. EdLongshanks

    EdLongshanks 12 pointer

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    Nov 16, 2013
    Northern Kentucky
    Women are not to behave like beasts. My God what has this world come to?
     
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  15. EdLongshanks

    EdLongshanks 12 pointer

    14,468
    11,890
    Nov 16, 2013
    Northern Kentucky
    I can tell you are traumatized...as you should be. Things will never be the same after this evening. It’s sad and it was completely avoidable if she hadn’t been so selfish. I pray for your strength in the days to come. Stay strong bud.
     

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